So-Cal Tacos

15 Feb

Cruisin’ the streets of DFW the So-Cal Taco truck, also known as Woody, has a short but sweet motto: “It’s all good.”  Being the cynic I am, I had a hard time believing that it would ALL good…but, it was! 

Unfortunately for my mouth, Woody usually posts up in Slovakia Fort Worth which makes it difficult for this one (me) to check it out.  Afterall, my name isn’t Oh Hey Metroplex, Oh Hey Mixmaster or Oh Hey BFE - it’s Oh Hey Dallas…because I do my best to never leave our city limits.  However, on this glorious day Dallas let our food truck friends who are powered on generators venture into town so I made sure to clear my calendar for lunch.

Naturally, I stalked the menu before heading out and settled on the San Diego Classic, a panko battered fish taco.  Actually being from California it has become clear to me over my years living in Texas that any so-called “California” style fish taco done outside of the actual sunshine state blows.  However, this truck is named So-Cal Tacos after all so I figured I should just suck it up and check theirs out.  Whoa,  Just whoa.  A perfectly sized nugget o‘battered fish is bundled up in a corn tortilla that is so fresh one can only assume that there is a hispanic granny in the truck cranking these suckers out.  Topped off with the classic shredded cabbage slaw and cilantro ailoi the San Diego Classic quickly moved into my #1 taco spot, sorry ’bout it my fried avocado friend from Torchy’s.  All tacos are also served with a lime wedge, an attention to detail that did not escape this Southern California taco snob.

Now, I’m not one for surprises unless they involve diamonds, Lucia reservations or shoes but Woody surprised when I walked up and saw that he was wearing a board full of specials.  My immediate thought was panic because surely I would have to get out of the long line and re-asses what to devour and I just didn’t have time for that.  My roller coaster of emotions was soon justified when I saw that the truck was serving up what they call, Gnarly Nachos. Check please!

The Gnarly Nachos consist of the perfect tortilla chip that doesn’t get soggy, doesn’t break and still manages to taste delicious. What an effin’ concept.  The chips immediately made me hate every other Mexican restaurant that provides you with those bullshit tissue-paper chips that disintegrate before you even touch them. Anyway… these heavenly chips were topped with black beans, cheese, shredded chicken, rice, salsa verde and cilantro ailoni.  The nachos came out just looking like they wanted to be murdered by my face.  I bet you want to lick the screen don’t you?  My dining companion was a little freaked out that there was rice on our nachos and I told her that was a straight Cali thing, yo.  I was happy to see that So-Cal Tacos didn’t let TexMex nation influence their style too much – not that TexMex is a bad thing in the least, it just doesn’t belong on a truck catering to Southern California style food. 

Seeing as it wasn’t noon or anything, we decided an order of the sopapilla fries would have to happen as well.  Yeah, I said it.  Sopapilla fries.  Genius right? Delicate “fries” are loaded with cinnamon and sugar and topped with your choice of chocolate, honey or strawberry topping.  For as gluttonous as they sound, the sopapilla fries are actually really light tasting which is a good thing seeing as those of us gorging on these still had to venture back to the office and pretend to work for the man.

The master behind So-Cal Tacos is Scott Wooley who can be described in one word, groovy.  Don’t laugh.  The word groovy is not in my daily vocabulary but it really is the only way to describe Scott.  A laid back dude with a carefree attitude, Scott can easily be spotted introducing himself and passing out high-fives as he takes patrons orders.  It is clear that the whole So-Cal Taco family loves what they do and I love to eat so clearly we have a lot in common.

As if the awesome food wasn’t enough to get hyped up about.  So-Cal Taco team donates 100% of tips each month to a different charity or family in need.  I mean reallllllly?  To be quite honest, my only critique of this food truck is that they don’t park out front of my work every day.  For reals – go and you will see for yourself how the crew at So-Cal Tacos is keeping it all good.

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People’s Last Stand

8 Feb

A few weeks ago I was invited to a menu release party for local foodies gastrophiles and bloggers at People’s Last Stand in Mockingbird Station.  Now, I wouldn’t say that I am a Mockingbird Station regular (mainly due to the HORRIFIC parking situation) but I do go there often enough to have a decent lay of the land.  Even though I was aware that People’s Last Stand had opened in October I was yet to a) go there and b) know where exactly it was.  Several sources describe the location as “overlooking Urban,” but apparently I took that a little too literally when I stood looking at the roof of Urban Outfitters for about 5 minutes which actually happens to be an apartment.  Who knew.

After my awkward wandering about and several text messages to my blogger friends inquiring about the location, I finally arrived!  People’s Last Stand, otherwise known just as People’s, is actually right above The Pretty Kitty…no wonder they describe their location as “overlooking Urban.”  After I walked in I was promptly greeted by a bubbly girl who handed me a cocktail.  Trying to sort out whether she was a friend of mine or if I was being roofied, I soon figured out that she was actually a cocktail waitress.  Oh.  In that case, can you make mine a double?

Shortly after we finished our cocktails we were ushered to sit down ta long table that the staff had created in a U-shape for us so that they could sit down and explain what all we were eating and the thoughts behind it.  Already resting at the table were several bowls of Maple Glazed Peanuts with Bacon.  As we all know, I don’t touch pig face with a 10 foot pole so as much as the maple glazing intrigued me I couldn’t devour them like I would have liked.  I did manage to fish out a few non-bacon pieces for Food Bitch and I.  These peanuts were effin’ nuts, no pun intended.  The glaze was perfectly flavored to the point where Food Bitch and I brainstormed on them making a non-oinking version.  Order these!

When our first appetizer arrived I wasn’t expecting much.  Don’t get me wrong, I love me some hummus but rarely does it taste all that different at a restaurant (unless you are Common Table) than it does out of a package from Tom Thumb.  After the hummus was placed in front of me, a trio of shot-glass sized cocktail samples did as well. OHHHH sure, get me wasted so everything will taste better!  Let me tell you, one does not have to be wasted to enjoy the hummus or any of the other food at People’s Last Stand to enjoy it.  In fact, I would almost prefer to be dead sober so I could enjoy the wonderful flavors that they draft up in their uber-tiny kitchen.  Mixed with green chili paste this hummus has an outstanding “oomph” of flavor and proved that golden rule of not judging something based on its appearance.  Served with cucumbers, carrots and pita bread this hummus is so delicious that People’s could make a killing by selling it. *Side Note: if Kartik, the owner, decides at some point to do that I demand 5%

Our second course was the Cuban Ropa Vieja Taco.  Never in my life have I heard Food Bitch ”mmmm” at something edible, I mean she is a bitch after all, and she wasn’t the only one making questionable sounds.  After the ropa vieja tacos were served the room was dead silent.  These tacos blow almost every taco I’ve ever had before it out of the water. YES, they are that good.  This is the kind of dish that I would drive specifically to the parking lot hell we know as Mockingbird Station just to eat these.  Served with jicima slaw and guacamole that is surprisingly spicy, these tacos have everything I could hope for and more.  As if I wasn’t already in love with these, we were informed that they are thinking about rolling out a chicken version at some point. 

Next up was the stuffed avocado.  Being a born and bred Southern California-er I like avocado anything.  Mash it, slice it, freeze it, fry it – I could give a shit as long as it is avocado.  Needless to say, I was pumped to try the stuffed version at People’s Last Stand.  Sigh.  Quite frankly it was disappointing.  Baked and stuffed with chicken, cheese and peppers it would be hard to imagine that anything could go wrong with this dish.  I won’t go so far to say that it was bad it just wasn’t great.  There was none of that distinct avocado flavor I adore so much and I definitely didn’t pick up any flavorings from the chicken, cheese or peppers that stuffed it.  Ok, before you assholes who like to nit pick every aspect of my blog say anything, I am very aware that it’s not avocado season. Thanks.  However, if you are bold enough to put avocado on your menu in January then they need to be legit.  Perhaps this dish would be better smothered in homemade salsa or something of the like.

Our next adventure led us to sandwiches.  People’s Last Stand gets their bread from Empire Baking Company, something that I adore and also appreciate.  It’s clear that these guys did their research of the Dallas market and luckily for their customers – we reap the benefits.  I assume it would be hard to make anything that lies between two slices of Empire’s delicious bread suck and People’s definitely doesn’t disappoint.  The sandwiches, although rather pig-facey, were solid in flavor and freshness.  My only critique is that there be a bit more variety when it comes to the meat selections.  Something to note is that each sandwich is accompanied with a horseradish pickle which blew most of my fellow gastrophiles and myself away.  The team at People’s said they searched high and low for the perfect pickle and they sure found it.  All of us who were able to experience the menu release party agreed that every home in Dallas should be stocked with a jar of these.  Not too spicy, surprisingly sweet and crisp – the horseradish pickles are reason alone to order a sandwich.

All in all, the food at People’s impressed me which as we know is pretty difficult to do.  This is a bar that I would specifically drive to Mockingbird Station just to eat at.  For having no oven and no grill, People’s does a fantastic job of conjuring up some wonderful flavors while staying true to their idea.  As Kartik put it, “We could have a lot or we could have a few very good items.”  At this point they are headed in the right direction with more items that I liked than I disliked and as they continue to tweek their menu they have the potential to be outstanding.

Let’s not forget about the cocktails…oh, the cocktails.  Too bad I write about food instead of things that get you sloshed!  That’s what my girl Susie Drinks Dallas does best.  If you haven’t given People’s Last Stand a try yet, whether it be for cocktails or food, you should.  Those tacos STILL have me daydreaming…

What kind of blogger would I be if I didn’t share the good AND the bad?  This past week I happened to be with some friends who weren’t lucky enough to be invited to media night so I suggested that we go over to People’s Last Stand so they could see just how awesome it was.  Well, I now look like a liar.  My second visit to People’s didn’t even come close to comparing to the first which was beyond disappointing.  The anticipation of craft cocktails and ropa vieja tacos had me feeling as giddy as a 26 year old 5 year old on Christmas morning.

I was happy to see that People’s had a decent crowd considering the location and as we sat down I immediately started suggesting some of the delicious cocktails that I was able to sample previously.  To make a long story short:  I was with 2 other people and therefore we ordered 3 drinks.  One drink came out 20 minutes, T.W.E.N.T.Y., before the other two.  Ok, what the fuck?  Isn’t the whole point of drinking alcohol to get shitfaced socialize?  It is pretty difficult to enjoy casual drunken conversation when one person is done with their drink entirely while the other people at the table nurse water.

Another disappointing aspect was the fact that we had to remind our server twice about our food order.  Now, I don’t mind waiting for my food but that food better be those damn tacos and not the hummus we ordered.  Hummus.  Any restaurant or bar that takes longer than 5 minutes to pour some hummus in a bowl and arrange some stale pita around it has an issue.

I hate that I have to rant given the fact that media night was just.so.awesome. but I would feel like a total asshole if y’all went to People’s expecting the glory that I mention in the main post and end up with the shit that I talk about down here.  Sure, some days restaurants just aren’t “on” and that is OK, but not when there is such a drastic change in experience.  Something that I personally think separates the men from the boys in the service industry is consistency.  If patrons have a hell of an experience one time and a horrible one the next, that’s an issue.  Sorry ‘ bout it.  I do suggest hitting up ol’ People’s to establish your own opinion.  My second visit clearly didn’t deter me too much considering I am armed with a Groupon and ready for round 3!

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Mr. Mesero

1 Feb

If I could say only one thing about Mr. Mesero it would be: BLEH.

Venturing over to this fairly new Knox/Henderson neighborhood spot for lunch I had no preconceived notions of Mr. Mesero.  In all honesty I would actually say I was a little put off going into my visit seeing as THEY HAVE NO WEBSITE.  How am I supposed to scope y’all out?  WTF!  Some of us (me) like to menu stalk before going to a restaurant to ensure that we aren’t out-ordered when our visit finally happens.  I don’t even care if they put their prices – if its delicious it can cost whatever it wants.  A fucking monkey could build a one-page website that displays the restaurant’s menu for Christ’s sake.  I mean…I have a website, clearly it’s not that difficult.

Seeing several mixed reviews of Mr. Mesero, I wanted to form my own opinion and not rely on Scott Reitz, or Yelp (eek) for that matter.

Pulling into Mr. Mesero’s spot I immediately rolled my eyes and cursed the fact that I decided to go here immediately after reading this gem.  Thanks, City of Ate.   In their defense, valet is sort of the only option at Mr. Mesero due to its ill placed location and 10 spot parking “lot” - besides, it is free which rarely happens in this town.

If you have never been to Mr. Mesero or any of the restaurants that previously occupied 4444 McKinney Ave, let me just tell you that the space is shockingly tiny.  Not tiny in a “wow, this is so exclusive” way.  It’s tiny in a “I guess we have to go to lunch at 10am so we can get a table” way.  Personally, I think this space would work better if it was like a nail salon or a momofuku.  Enough about me, let’s get to the goods, or in the case of Mr. Mesero – the not so goods.

Although Mr. Mesero is not technically part of the M Crowd, Mico Rodriguez has taken quite  a few aspects from the cult-follwing restaurant Mi Cocina.  For example, the chips.  Just like Mi Cocina, Mr. Mesero serves up those wretchedly tasteless corn chips.  Maybe it’s the fact that they are, afterall, chips or maybe its that we all mindlessly munch on them just because they are in front of our face – but they really aren’t good.  The chips at both places have a burnt taste to them, the only difference between the two restaurants is that Mr. Mesero serves theirs up disk-shaped.  Hey guys, the shape doesn’t improve the taste. 

In hopes of making the chips not suck, my table ordered the classic guacamole.  Classic guacamole = spicy at Mr. Mesero.  I love me some spicy food but after taking a heaping dip of guacamole I was shocked that there was no warning.  Maybe I’ll refer to the menu to see what ingredients they used…oh wait.  The guacamole was decent I suppose but nothing I would go specifically to Mr. Mesero for.

For my entree, I ordered up the “Mexicana.”  It was ordered out of sheer peer pressure and it was a  bad idea.  I should have taken the lesson that my mother taught me years ago: don’t cave into peer pressure.  I don’t care if it pisses everyone at your table and the waiter off but make sure you really assess the situation before making any rash decisions when it comes to food.  The Mexicana sounded like it could have potential seeing as it was one brisket enchilada and one chicken enchilada.  Negative.  What showed up at the table looked more like a blood soaked plate than lunch.  In my book the only food that is allowed to look unappetizing is hummus and chili, the end.  Perhaps I would be able to forgive the visual Mexicana disaster if it was actually good, which it wasnt.  The general consensus around the table was that all of our meals fell flat. 

Trying to make amends with our taste buds we decided split a dessert which, at the urging of our waiter, was the chocoalte flan.  I think this is the first time in my life that I allowed dessert at lunch, minus Trailercakes which is excusable at any time of the day.  It is pretty safe to say that the best part of the meal was the chocolate flan…..and I don’t even like flan. gulp. Chocolate cake topped with flan with sea salt and caramel drippings.  At any other restaurant I probably would have hated this but it was the newly identified “Mr. Mesero good.”

All in all this was a more than disappointing experience.  From mediocre interior to mediocre food – we wont be returning to Mr. Mesero ever in the near future.

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Company Cafe

11 Jan

I’ve heard a lot about Company Cafe in the past but I try to avoid going on Greenville Ave unless I’m hammered so a visit to this organic gem didn’t seem to be in the cards for me.  That is until they opened their second location right off the lovely Katy Trail in Uptown.

Although Company Cafe has set up shop right next to my arch-enemy, Uptown’s very own hell hole Katy Trail Ice House, I figured I had to venture over there and try them out.  My first (and second) visit to Company Cafe was about a week after their Uptown location opened.  The teeny-tiny quaint dining room was shocking and immediately sent a sense of unease to my brain-”Holy fuck, this place is going to be so crowded come Spring.”

I was not-so-pleasantly surprised by the fairly small menu that greeted me upon my visit.  For all the pump up talk I had heard about Company Cafe it didn’t seem right that there were only 11 items on the lunch menu and that includes salads, appetizers AND entrees.  Better hope I’m not in the mood for something in particular!

Driven by a friend’s blatant order suggestion that I try the loaded sweet potato fries to start, I knew that that was a given. I was a bit hesitant because the word “loaded” to any non-pork eater automatically means “topped with pig face.”  Luckily enough, one of my dining buddies doesn’t eat that shit either so we got it on the side.  Apparently on the side at Company Cafe means a ginormous bowl.  I dig it. Deliciously sweet fries topped with just the right amount of melted cheese and jalapenos convinced me almost immediately that my friend who had suggested them was Einstein. (Don’t get too excited @cjconner1)

Seeing as I wasn’t exactly on a health kick the day of my visit - my fellow foodie and I decided to share the Chicken Fried Steak.  A heaping plate filled with battered top sirloin, sweet potato mash and green beans quickly arrived at our table.  I couldn’t wait to dive face first into the jalapeno-honey gravy drenched chicken fried steak…and I fucking hate gravy.

Although my last-meal-if-I-was-on-death-row-list is the hardest ticket to get in town, I’ve made an exception for this chicken fried steak.  It is cooked wonderfully and accompanied with sweet potato mash that is the envy of any at home-chef with how smooth and creamy it is.  The sautéed green beans are standard but nice to see such a simple vegetable on a seemingly heavy dish.

Something I really appreciate about Company Cafe is how their menu, although uncomfortably small, varies depending on the meal time.  Seeing as I’m not a huge breakfast person, my second visit to the restaurant clearly had to be dinner.

Sticking with the fried theme from my first visit I ordered up the Chicken & Waffles.  Fortunately for most of you carnivorous Texans, chunks of bacon and jalapeno are mixed into the batter itself.  Seeing as I’m not one of you people – the bacon aspect made me want to shove my face in a toilet rather than onto my plate, so my waffles consisted of jalapeno only.  A delightfully fluffy and rather spicy, well duh, waffle came topped with crispy chicken.  Fried just like the chicken fried steak in olive oil, the crunch of the batter is just perfect.  Not to mention it is gluten-free! Although the chicken itself was rather bland, the spice of the waffle and the sweetness of the maple syrup that accompanied the dish made up for that.

My table also ordered the Chicken Pesto Risotto which was like a Caprese salad on cRaCk.  Creamy, sticky risotto was topped with a large slice of semi-melted Dallas mozarella, sun-dried tomatoes and chicken breast. The risotto was a tad bit under-cooked but it had cheese on it, and cheese makes everything right in the world.  I could have used a little more pesto mixed in, but then again I essentially use an entire jar when I cook pasta for one.  This dish would be perfect with red pepper flakes mixed in and although I didn’t ask for any – I will be sure to bring my own secret stash next time!

We also ordered The Company Burger.  This burger was exactly what you would expect if you were a kid again and Dad was grilling burgers in the backyard.  A misshapen patty topped with gooey cheese on a fresh bun tastes just like home (unless my mother is cooking).  Not only is the burger delicious but it is also accompanied with, dare I say, Dallas’ BEST  sweet potato fries. You can make The Company Burger double pattied, a Buffalo burger, a double Buffalo burger and/or get it on a gluten-free bun.  Not only is there meat and bun options, you also get to pick from their various farm-fresh cheeses.  These include blue cheese, cheddar, goat, parmesan, feta, mozarella or queso blanco. #Winning. (I hate myself for just writing that).

Although my dinner at Company Cafe was delicious I was really looking forward to inhaling their braised short ribs.  Unfortunately they were out of them when I went which wasn’t brought to my attention until I actually ordered it.  Service fail.  On the upside, I am looking forward to dining at Company Cafe again soon and they better make the short ribs extra delicious - they owe me.

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Pie Five Pizza

4 Jan

I love food.  I mean I really, really love food.  Rarely do I turn down the opportunity to eat delicious food, let alone try out a new restaurant.

When I was contacted by Pie Five Pizza with the offer to try out their latest location of North Central Expressway I, of course, accepted in a heartbeat.  Now, just because someone offers me some free food doesn’t mean that a) I’ll try it or b) I’ll enjoy it.  Willing to take a chance, Pie Five sent me a few vouchers so that I could check them out anyway.

At Pie Five Pizza you can choose from one of their creations or customize your own personal sized pizza.  Their website boasts that there are over 5 million combination possibilities.  Sounds like a challenge to me.

Intrigued by the concept, a self-proclaimed “Subway of pizza,” I stepped into the restaurant right off Knox and 75 South for a much-needed calorie boost while Christmas shopping.  Believe it or not, I am not the human version of the Grinch.

My first observation was that the menu posted on the wall behind the counter was fairly small and hard to read.  Granted, I am quasi-blind so I’m sure it isn’t difficult for some people to read but it was for me and I’m the one who counts here.  Not only is the text small, it’s also white writing on a black board which is hard to read regardless of the size of the text.  Thinking to myself, “Hmm…guess I’ll be creating my own pizza considering I can’t read shit” the young girl must have sensed my confusion and promptly asked if I would like their signature thick crust or thin crust.  Whoa, I get to choose my crust? Hell.Yes. I went with thick, le duh.

Creating my own pizza turned out to be quite the experience because not only did I get to pick which type of crust I wanted to enjoy but chose the sauce as well.  Yep, I said it.  Pie Five Pizza has several sauce options to choose from including: alfredo, spicy diavalo, garlic and of course, traditional marinara.  Not wanting to stray too far off course – I decided to go with the traditional.  After all, I wanted to be able to judge what most would consider “normal” pizza and making my pizza with alfredo sauce would already give Pie Five a major leg up.

Sure as shit there are several topping options, living up to their “Subway of pizza” proclamation.  Double sure as shit I stood confused as hell just like I do at actual Subways trying to dream up the perfect flavor combinations.  On this particular visit I went with a Hawaiian-like pie and my dining companion went with….every topping possible.

One of the best things about Pie Five Pizza is the steroid-infused oven.  This sucker perfectly cooks your pizza in 5 minutes or less. While I waited for my lunch to be served I perused the immaculately clean dining room.  Too often restaurants who focus on being “quick” end up being messy because of the high turnover (gross) but not here.  The floors had recently been swept, there wasn’t an ounce of trash on the empty tables and the beverage station was as clean as could be.  I could give a rats ass if I’m eating at Jack in the Box or Stephen Pyles, that bitch better be clean.

A mere 4 minutes after placing our order, two gorgeously baked pizzas arrived at our table.  Diving in mouth first, I was immediately impressed with how fresh everything tasted.

I’ll admit it.  I am the ultimate crust whore.  Nothing pisses me off more than people who don’t eat the crust of their pizza.   I have not and will not ever understand “those people.”  Luckily for me the thick crust at Pie Five was delicious and could rival some of the best pizza places in the city.  It was  just thin enough to not feel like it was all bread but still thick enough to feel like I was actually eating pizza. I wasn’t particularly impressed with the thin crust but then again that shit is a bit too healthy for me.  No matter where the pizza is from, thin crust tastes like someone took a fat dump of toppings on a cardboard box.

Something else I noticed while inhaling my lunch was that pizza boxes were readily available at the counter and in the dining room itself.  Such a simple gesture that means so much.  It is always annoying having to ask for a box for your leftovers but at Pie Five you can just walk right up and grab your own and be on your way.

Some of you may say that I am partial to Pie Five because they let me try them for free.  For those of you who say that, I say Fuck You try them out for yourself and see how awesome it is.

In the time that it would take you to call up a pizza delivery place and wait for your pizza, you could get your ass in the car and drive to Pie Five build a delicious creation, get home and eat it – All for a little over $6.  I mean really….is there any question which is the better option?

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Del Friscos Grille

28 Dec

A lot of my fellow foodie friends have blogged about the new Del Frisco’s Grille.  Unfortunately for me, most of them were invited to their pre-opening day press dinner .  I’m pretty pissed that I wasn’t invited because not only do I like to eat for free but my witty sense of humor is always a real treat.

Although I was full of rage, the pictures I saw of their food couldn’t keep me away for very long.  In fact, the food looked so delicious that I only invited people who would eat a lot to join me when I went so we could eat until we puked.

Del Frisco’s Grille was packed out when we arrived – something I like to see at any new Dallas restaurant.  I really do want to see everyone in the restaurant business succeed…ok, that’s a lie.  If you fucking blow and I hate you, I don’t want you to succeed because you are wasting space of a potentially amazing other restaurant.  Like I was saying, Del Frisco’s Grille was packed and even though we had reservations we still had to wait for at least 20 minutes to be seated.  I can’t particularly say I appreciated that but what I did appreciate was the fact that the bar is 3 steps from the hostess stand and there was a Kilt Lifter cocktail waiting to be drunk by me.

Once we finally sat down, I was STARVING, not that that is anything new for me. We immediately asked our server which appetizers he would suggest and without hesitation he said the Jumbo Lump Crabcake and Asian Chicken Dumplings.  Dumplings? No thanks, this isn’t Panda Express.  Crabcakes? Twist my arm!

Now, if there is one thing I hate it is  when a restaurant serves a crab cake.  How awkward.  I don’t care if it is so delicious that it cures cancer, when you put one crab cake on a plate (and charge $16 for it) that immediately turns me off.  The only time serving one crab cake is permissible is when it is in between two pieces of bread and disguised as being a sandwich.  Anyway, the jumbo lump crabcake was fine – not exactly something that I would suggest as being a must try if I was a waiter but that could be why I don’t work there.  There was quite a bit of crab meat and hardly any breading which was nice, but it is a cake after all - a little bit of breading would be nice.  The cajun lobster sauce tasted nothing like lobster or…cajun.  Strike 1. 

Giving a mental “go fuck yourself” to the waiter I decided it was time to take matters into my own hands.  I went ahead and ordered the Ahi Tacos, Deviled Eggs, Cheesesteak Eggrolls, Pimento Cheese Fritters, Pulled Roasted Chicken Flatbread and a Roasted Tomato Flatbread.  WHAT? There were 10 4 people at our table after all!

The Ahi Tacos were everything I’ve dreamed of and more.  Fresh ahi that was wonderfully…raw.  The plump and juicy meat was mixed with avocado and topped with spicy citrus mayo.  To make the situation even better, all off these goodies came in  a delicious fried wonton shell – as if anything could suck when it comes in a fried shell.  To add to my obsession, the ahi tacos came in a mini taco holder.  Strike 1 was dismissed.

I was a little confused when the deviled eggs arrived at our table.  I could have sworn that we ordered the regular deviled eggs, not the ones that looked like they had green diarrhea on top.  Although the presentation was horrifying, the deviled eggs themselves were delicious.  The filling was extremely smooth and overflowing out of the egg white.  Atop the egg was a truffle-chive vinaigrette which didn’t have much taste at all – disappointing since I love me some truffles. All in all I did enjoy the deviled eggs but would hesitate in ordering them again just because of the way they are presented- Barftastic!

Next, it was time to criticize sample the Cheesesteak Eggrolls.  Like I said earlier, it is really hard for something to be shitty when it comes in a fried shell and these were no exception!  I don’t really have much to say about these because I’m 99% positive this was the point I started to fall into a food coma.  What I can say is it tastes like a cheesesteak sandwich, rolled in a tube and fried and therefore there I can’t even come up with the slightest bit of negative feedback.

Not to be deterred by my food coma, I pressed on.

The pimento cheese fritters were my next victim.  These were disgusting. This just may be the first time in my entire life that I actually hated something that was fried.  All this time I thought that you could fry up a ball of poop and I’d like it but nay, Del Frisco’s Grille found something worse and its called a pimento cheese fritter.  Isn’t a fritter supposed to be flat?  These were balls.  Pimento cheese explode-in-your-mouth balls.  The fried part was great (duh), it was the slurpy surprise inside that was repulsive.  And the sauce? Chipotle Ranch my ass.  Ugh, I can’t go on – I’m starting to dry heave.

Last but not least it was flat-bread time.  We ordered the Pulled Roasted Chicken first and it was so fantastically delicious that we ordered the Roasted Tomato- you know, something “light.”  Not too big and not too small, the flatbreads are perfect for sharing or can be a meal of their own.  I wasn’t particularly impressed with the Roasted Tomato as it tasted like a sub-par margherita pizza you can get from any Italian-esque restaurant. On the other hand, the pulled roasted chicken was absolutely insane – in a good way. Thinly sliced red skinned potatoes and pulled chicken rest upon a deliciously light layer of goat cheese.  I really appreciate the crust of Del Frisco Grille’s flatbreads - too often flatbreads arrive too thin and the crust practically falls apart.  Not here! They have found the perfect combination of thin crust and serious pizza!

Unfortunately, I either seemed to love or hate the items we tried.  Oh well, different strokes for different folks right? Fuck that. This is MY blog so what I say sucks – sucks!  Out of the laundry list of items that we sampled during our visit to Del Frisco’s Grille I would come back again and again for the ahi tacos and the roasted chicken flat bread.  These two items in particular are absolutely fantastic.

Oh, and for the people of Del Frisco’s Grille, I’m sure everything tasted delicious on press night…you know, the one I wasn’t invited to? Please note.

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Asador

21 Dec

I believe the combination to a successful restaurant is pretty simple: drinks and food.  I’m not talking about just any drinks and food either – too often restaurants are known for having really great drinks and mediocre food or vice versa.  Isn’t the whole point to have exceptional food AND drinks? It never ceases to surprise me that so many restaurants get this combo wrong.

My sources (Susie Drinks Dallas) informed me that the drinks at the Renaissance hotel’s latest addition, Asador, were out-of-control delicious, so naturally I had to go make sure the food was at an equal level as well.

Believe it or not this shit my witty blogging doesn’t pay my bills so I have a day job. This day job of mine requires me to spend an uncomfortable amount of time in hotels so the lowest thing on my priority list is stepping into on of those comfy-night-sleep-blood-suckers.  Because of this, I was a little hesitant to go to a hotel to eat while being at home but I will pretty much do anything (I mean anything) for a good meal so I got over my little diva moment  real quick.

Seeing as I’m a hotel restaurant eater connoisseur I went into my visit to Asador stern faced and ready to judge the shit out of their food.

One thing that I appreciated about Asador before even setting foot inside was the fact that they use social media.  Der, I love that.  I’m constantly seeing tweets about their happy hours and enticing menu items but they utterly surprised me when I sat down and my menu was placed in front of me.  If you show your server that you “like” Asador on Facebook, you get a free glass of house wine! Offering me something free if I use social media? Brilliant!  I’m not sure if this is was a genius ploy to win me over or to prevent people from grazing their misspelled beer list.   T-A-C-A-T-E anyone?

Not that this has anything to do with what I consumed but the decor is awkward,  the restaurant almost feels cafeteria like with a big open room overlooking the lobby of the hotel and lights so bright I feel like I’m 19 again being interrogated by the po-pos for drinking Apple McCormicks in my dorm room. Flashbacks?

Asador prides itself on using all fresh and local products which, although may not be innovative, is rare.  In my opinion too few restaurants around town don’t give a fuck about that.  Points for being hometown friendly!

Let’s get to the nitty gritty, or rather, the foods shall we?  The menu is one of the oddest I have seen.  From calamari to hot dogs, steaks to scallops, I was utterly confused and impressed.  I love creativity as well as a wide array of choices when I’m dining out…but to an extent.  If it takes me over 10 minutes to make a decision of what to order, maybe the “creativity” has gone a little far.

We started out with the cheese plate and the crab dip.  Too many restaurants nowadays have cheese plates so I wasn’t expecting something particularly life changing but this one was rather impressive.  The chef chooses 3 cheeses which vary daily, all of which are locally produced.  Each cheese is perfectly paired with its own garnish or sauce making for a delicious combination….tripled. Yes please!

The crab dip, composed of a little spice and brilliant shredded crab meat made for a dip that was decent but nothing I would rush to order again.  One impressive thing was that our waiter did bring over more crostini for dipping before we even got close to needing it, something that is always needed but rarely happens.  I love when I don’t have to ask for something and my server goes all Miss Cleo.

Through my menu stalking I had heard rave reviews about Asador’s tortilla soup.  Although it has pulled pork in it, I still tried it after making a point to fish around Babe’s face.  Generally speaking I like soup, but to me it is just a waste of space for some other delicious food I could actually chew so I rarely care much about it.  This tortilla soup however is a game changer.  It is amazing – perfect in taste, texture and spice.  It’s so delicious that I’m PISSED that there is pork in it!

When our entrees arrived I got a little more pissed off.  I hate to do this, but I have to blow the whistle on the fact that the men in our party were served first. A huge no-no regardless of where you are in the country but even more apropos seeing as this is Dallas, the epitome of dining etiquette. Fail.

I ordered the flatiron steak with chimicuri.  Forgive me god for I live in Texas and am not a steak person. Ya, I said it.  Not only am I not a huge steak person but I eat mine medium WELL. Sue me. I like the animal I’m eating to actually be dead.  Regardless I must have been in caveman mode or maybe I just had to settle on something after turning my waiter away at least 4 times not being ready.  Holy shit.  Perfectly cooked, check. Perfectly seasoned, check. Perfectly portioned, check. check. check. Accompanied by spicy ketchup which was more like watered down salsa, the steak was a shining star.  I ate the entire thing, an impressive victory for a non-steak-eater.

Other edible friends that visited our table was the hot dog topped with fried pickles but I don’t do hot dogs either so I can’t review the taste.  Visually? It was adorable.
Two of the burgers with duck fat fries graced our table as well and the consensus was “that was a damn good burger.”  A half pound of meat on a fresh roll topped with your choice of cheese – standard ordering process but above- average on taste.

For dessert we ordered the pecan bars which were alright I guess but near impossible to cut making it hard to share and for everyone to get a taste.  Loaded with pecans, almost to a fault and with sticky caramel holding the bars together this dessert is something I could pick up at the gas station in South Dallas any day of the week.

We also ordered the bread pudding.  Served in a piping hot skillet, I honestly have no idea about the bread because I was too busy making out with the in-house made ice cream. WHOA!  I love me some ice cream and I rarely discriminate (unless its bullshit custard from Wild about Harry’s which sucks – please feel free quote me on that) but this ice cream was out of control.  Never in my life has vanilla been so perfect.

All in all Asador was a great experience.  A few simple tweaks to the decor to  make it a little more private and this place will have everything it takes to become a Dallas staple.

I can’t even begin to talk about the exceptional cocktails that are dreamt up here.  Asador’s bar is the Willy Wonka of cocktail creation.   The seasoned travelers at my table all agreed that we would murder someone to have a restaurant like this in all hotels.  Asador is bringing a whole new idea of hotel dining and I couldn’t be happier that it’s happening in Dallas!

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New Year’s Eve Things!

15 Dec

Here is our list of shit going on for that holiday that everyone thinks is overrated New Years Eve.  Please note that this list will be added on to continuously so keep checking back for more!

Komali

Special three-course tasting menu for $65  including the following:

Appetizer

Goat Cheese Crepe with a Chipotle and Roasted Peanut Mole

Entree

Mulato Chili Relleno with Roasted Muscovy Duck with Blackberry Sauce, Corn Flan and Sautéed Potatoes

Dessert

Mixiote of Roasted Pears with Cheese Pastry and Rum Vanilla Ice Cream

Hotel Zaza

“Bubbles and Babes” New Year’s Eve party

Performance by DJ Jeff Mitchell, burlesque dancers, hors d’oeuvres and champagne tower.

Tickets are $75 and go on sale December 30th at 7am. Dress is “Flapper Fabulous”. Black Tie Suggested.

Horne & Dekker

Special 4-course NYE Dinner with complimentary champagne toast- $65.  Menu includes:

COURSE 1
 • Black eyed pea soup
• Popeye salad
• Salmon salad
• Caprese salad skewers

COURSE 2
 • Crab cakes
• Stuffed mushrooms
• Goat cheese & spinach ravioli
• Fried bacon wrapped shrimp with pepper jack cheese

COURSE 3
 • Cowboy Ribeye
• Filet & lobster tail
• Tiger prawns & potato cake with Sriracha butter sauce
• Pork osso buco

COURSE 4
 • German chocolate cake
• Fresh berries & crème fraiche
• White chocolate banana bread pudding

J.Blacks

$40 Individual Ticket: V

IP Entry, Menu Item and Champagne Toast

$500 Table for 4: 4 VIP Entries, 4 Reserved Seats, 4 Menu Items, Personalized Bottle Service and Premium bottle of champagne

$575 Table for 6: 6 VIP E ntries, 6 Reserved Seats, 6 Menu Items, Personalized Bottle Service and Premium bottle of champagne

Cork Room is also available for a private group experience

Entertainment by DJ Bryan C

Book at: www.JBlacksDallas.com/NYE

Sambuca

Music by Moving Color and a 4-course dinner with a choice of 1 item from each category:

Appetizers
Cup of Shrimp & Crab Bisque Seabass Skewers: skewered ponzu-glazed seabass with asparagus
Buca Beignets: stuffed with mozzarella & prosciutto, with jalapeño-basil & balsamic glaze
Beef & Chicken Satay: with teriyaki & sriracha

Salads
House Salad: tomato, cucumber, red onion, crumbled feta cheese, dressed with an aged balsamic vinaigrette
Gorgonzola Salad: mixed field greens in Gorgonzola dressing topped with caramelized walnuts

Entrees
Blackened Red Snapper Étouffée: with shrimp & crab over a bed of spinach with dirty rice
Lamb Chops: domestic lamb seared and topped with a five-pepper mint jelly, served with smashed potatoes & asparagus
Miso Seabass: atop jasmine rice, sautéed apples & baby bok choy
Petite Filet with Shrimp: petite filet served with three grilled shrimp, asparagus spears & bleu cheese walnut butter
Stuffed Chicken: chicken breast stuffed with spinach, dried cherries & mascarpone cheese

Dessert Trio
sticky toffee pudding, chocolate mousse and crème brulée

7pm seating $49 per person

930pm seating $100 per person

930pm seating on enclosed patio $75 per person

The Gin Mill

$125 a ticket includes:

Open bar from 9pm-3am

Passed hors d’oeuvres and food stations from 8pm-1130pm

Complimentary glass of champagne toast at midnight

Complimentary coat check

Zizikis

$55 per person 3-course dinner includes:
A sampling of the chef’s favorite appetizers
Your choice of Greek Salad, Mediterranean Salad or Caprese Salad
Your choice from your favorite Ziziki’s specialities including:

  • Greek Paella
  • Grilled Rack of Lamb
  • Mediterranean Lamb Shank

6pm, 8pm and 10pm Seatings Available

Monica’s Aca Y Alla

$60 per person includes:
~ 3 course dinner
~ Bottle of Champagne per couple
~ Party favors at midnight
~ Music by Chilo and his high energy band
~ A gift card for Monica’s worth $30 dollars

Reservations are required, so please call 214-748-7140 to let us know what time you would like to join us! Seating will be made from 8-10 PM.

Bailey’s

Special 5 course pre-fixe menu created by Chef Grant Morgan for $80 per person-Reservations are recommended.

Champagne toast at Midnight and party favors included

There will be live music in the lounge from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m.

Marquee Grill

$295 per seat includes: 9 course tasting menu and a glass of Dom Perignon to start (Dining Room Only)

$250 per person includes: Open Bar, food & dessert stations, dancing and party favors (Upstairs Bar Only)

Primebar

Two dinner seating options

4 course dinner prepared by Chef Taylor McCreary

10pm seating will include a special price on Moet and Belvedere.

Email nyeprimebardallas@gmail.com for more details.

Common Table

$55 per person

5 course meal (customizable)

7pm and 930pm seating

Tapping: Rahr BBA Winter Warmer, St. Bernardus Christmas, Delirium Noel, Rogue Double Chocolate Stout and Oskar Blues Ten Fidy

Private Social

$125 per person 6 course prix fixe dinner with menu developed by Chef Tiffany Derry

$175 per person with wine or cocktail pairings

Live music throughout the night

Amuse

Nantucket Bay Scallops

Serrano Ham, Wasabi Greens, Kumquat

I

Warm Lobster “Cake”

Coconut and Lemongrass Broth, Avocado, Cilantro

Garden Gimlet – Hendricks, Fresh Lime Juice, Lemongrass syrup, Basil, Cilantro

II

Duck & Foie Ravioli

Butternut Squash, Lambs Lettuce, Marsala

Cognac Cobbler – Hennessy VS, Lemon Juice, Simple syrup, Topped with a Mix of Seasonal Berries

III

Norwegian Halibut

Artichoke Barigoule, Chorizo Tomato Sauce, Fennel Salad

Bitter Italian – Zucca, Dimmi, Sun Dried Tomato Water, Grapefruit

IV

Chianti Braised Short Ribs

Polenta, Red Cabbage, Figs

Poisoned Apple – Lairds 7.5 Year Old Apple Brandy, Dark Cherry Balsamic, Swedish Berb Bitters, Tennyson Absinthe

V

Poached Pear and Goat Cheese Crostini

VI

Chocolate Surprise

Guatemalan Chel – Ron Zacapa Infused with Figs and Cinnamon, Godiva Chocolate Liqueur, Vanilla Ice Cream

NOSH

$99 per person includes a complimentary glass of champagne and the menu below:

AMUSE BOUCHE
Warm Cauliflower Soup: smoked scallop and brown butter

CHOICE OF APPETIZER

Pear and Endive Salad: blue cheese, frisée and fried shallots
Nantucket Bay Scallop Crudo: tomato, arugula and truffled cucumber gazpacho
Ahi Tuna Tartare: asian pear, avocado and puffed rice
Smoked Bacon wrapped Native Quail: savory bread pudding, malt vinegar gastrique and caramelized pearl onions
Seared Hudson Valley Foie Gras: duck confit and black mission fig confiture
Kobe Meat Balls:black truffle bernaise

CHOICE OF ENTREE

Pan Roasted “Loch Duart” Salmon: roasted brussel sprouts, marble potatoes, pancetta and whole grain mustard jus

Rabbit and Maine Lobster Fricasse: foie gras and maitake mushrooms

Grilled Beef Tenderloin: cauliflower leek mash, watercress and black truffle jus
(add Maine Lobster Tail $19)

Mixed Grill: Brochette a la Greek with Lamb Chop ratatouille and kobe beef parsillade

Espresso Braised Beef Short Ribs: yellow cheddar grits and cured tomatoes

DESSERT:
Degustation for Two

Cedars Social

$59 per person includes 3 course dinner by Chef Kyle McClelland and a glass of Moet Imperial Champagne.

$89 per person includes 5 course dinner and a glass of Ruinart Blanc de Blanc Champagne

Five Sixty

$175 per person includes a 5 course prix fixe dinner with selections from Chef Patton Robertson’s dishes including, Wagyu Beef Tatake, Celeriac Soup, Main Lobster, Seared Duck Breast and a champagne toast.

An additional $50 will include wine pairings for each course.

Two seatings available.

Extend the evening at The Tower for an additional $75, which will also include complimentary valet.

The Grape

$65 per person: 3 course prix fixe menu with the option to add wine pairings for $20.

All guests will receive a complimentary glass of champagne and party favors

The Landmark Restaurant

$85 per person includes champagne toast and:

Lobster bisque with claw meat relish

And

Apricot glazed quail breast OR toasted quinoa artisan green salad

And

Your choice of entrée (3 specially chosen for this menu)

And

Signature Dessert

ROHST

630pm and 830pm seating available

$49 per person: 4 course prix fixe menu with regular favorites as well as special off the menu items to choose from.

Includes dessert of your choice

Midnight champagne toast

Saint Ann

Live DJ from 8:30pm-2am

Views of Big D NYE Fireworks from patio

$50 per person for reservations between 5:30 pm to 7 pm

$70 a person for reservations between 7:30 pm to 10:30 pm

4 course dinner and complimentary champagne toast

Menu include:

Dates & Sizzlers Medley (Chorizo Stuffed Dates Wrapped in Bacon/ Chicken and Jalapeno Sizzlers Wrapped in Bacon)

Choice of: Cream of Butternut Squash Soup, Salad of Chicories or Crab Croquettes

Entrees (Choice of one):

Half Free Range Chicken with Baked Potato and Grilled Asparagus

12oz Sirloin in Beurre Maitre d’hotel or Green peppercorn sauce with Baked Potato and Grilled Asparagus

Pan Sauteed Filet of Sea Bass, Braised Leeks, Champagne Beurre Blanc with Lump Crab

Dessert (Choice of one):

Chocolate Molten Cake

Roasted Apple Bread Pudding with Tahitian Vanilla Ice Cream

The Company Cafe

$50 per person for a 3-course dinner and complimentary glass of champagne

6:30pm and 8:30pm seatings

Reservations must be made by December 29 at 5pm

Menu includes:

Appetizers (Pick One)

Butternut Squash Soup

Smoked Salmon Mousse with Crispy Polenta Cake and Lemon Caper Aioli

Diver Sea Scallops with Champagne Blood Orange Reduction 

Entrées (Pick One)

Wagyu Sirloin Marsala with Roasted Baby Carrots, Cauliflower Florets and Truffle Oil

Pan Seared Atlantic Redfish with Winter Vegetable Risotto and Herb Butter Sauce

Maple Leaf Farms Duck Breast with Praline Sweet Potato Hash, Haricot Verts and
Bourbon Onion Marmalade   

Dessert – Choose a slice from the evening’s selection of Gluten-Free Cakes

Steel

$45 per person: 3 course prix fixe menu (regular menu still available)

Starters

  • Red Curry Lobster Bisque
  • House Made Gravlox Cured with Sake & fennel, served with a shallot-scallion mouse
  • Fresh Steamed Shui Mai Chinese dumplings with pork filling and served with a soy-based dipping sauce
  • Noel Maki Roll Rolled with ahi tuna, asparagus & yamagobo, topped with red and green tobiko caviar

Entrees

  • Grilled Beef Strip Loin Steak, Red wine reduction sauce, Asian mushroom compote and Yukon Gold mashed potatoes
  • Pan Seared Alaskan Black Cod With tomatillo-lime beurre blanc and vegetable fried rice
  • Roast Plump Chicken Breast Filled with Texas goat cheese and Asian pear, with a brown butter-Gewürztraminer sauce and Yukon Gold mashed potatoes
  • Pad Kew Mao Thai style flat noodles stir fried with vegetables and large shrimp, scallops and calamari

Desserts

  • Brandy Fruit Foster Served with Vanilla Bean ice cream
  • Christmas Bread Pudding Served with Cinnamon ice cream

The Commissary

$75 per person: 4 course tasting menu

$125 per person: 4 course tasting menu with wine pairings


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Cupcakin Machine

7 Dec

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it 100 times, our city has fallen victim to the cupcake craze.  Not that I’m complaining, it’s just amazing that these little puppies have such a following that businesses focusing solely on cake in cups are a recurring possibility.

Another new addition to the scene, Cupcakin Machine has recently hit the streets in their van serving fresh cupcakes all around the city.  We all know how big of an advocate I am for Trailercakes, but I’m an equal opportunity eater so I obviously had to try Cupcakin Machine.

After an mid-week work slump, I was happy to find “the machine” set up in the arts district.  If I couldn’t naturally motivate myself perhaps a sugar high would help, right?

I definitely needed to try several favors out if I was going to produce a solid opinion of Cupcakin Machine so I decided on cookies and cream, pumpkin carrot, strawberry lemonade and german chocolate. 

The strawberry lemonade flavor confused me seeing as it was freezing outside under 70 degrees the thought of something with such a summer connotation wasnt exactly appealing.  The flavor idea was intriguing but just the idea of lemonade brought back flashbacks of melting into my leather couch during my tour of hell this summer.  I tried it anyway and was happy I did.  A light an airy strawberry cake topped with the seemingly standard thin layer of frosting.  Although I didn’t really get the taste of lemon or lemonade, this was a damn good cupcake anyway.

What Trailercakes‘ cookie monster lacks, Cupcakin Machine makes up for in their version of cookies and cream.  The light and airy chocolate cake is perfect if you want something not too heavy but are still in the mood for that beloved chocolate taste.  A delicious, although inappropriately thin layer of frosting sits atop the cake which is then topped with crushed oreo-like crumbs.  This particular cookies and cream cupcake is the closest I’ve ever tasted to the actual ice cream flavor – a staple in my house.

After such an amusing experience shoving my face with the cookies and cream cupcake I dove mouth first into the pumpkin carrot.  Meh.  Ain’t got shit on the Jack from Trailercakes.  Although the taste was acceptable, it wasn’t what you’d expect from a pumpkin flavored cupcake.  Hardly any of that fall spice that I happen to adore is identifiable and there is an uncomfortable number of…chunks.   Even though typical carrot cake has the texture and bits of walnuts, carrot and even pineapple - something about that in this particular cupcake doesn’t work.  I think the theory of this is better than the actual execution.

I also tried the German Chocolate.  Assuming the same cake is used for that as well as the Cookies & Cream left me a little confused?  As delicious as the cookies & cream cupcake was, the cake of the actual German chocolate was dry.  Obviously the frosting was insane, but who can go wrong with coconut, pecans and SUGAR? Unfortunately, I probably wouldn’t get the german chocolate again because of the cake part.

All in all I’m eager to try some more of Cupcakin Machine‘s flavors and hope that the seasons begin to influence their flavor selection that they offer.  As long as cookies and cream is on the menu, I’ll be poking my head through the window of the van without hesitation.

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Greenhouse Truck

30 Nov

I have a problem.  I really, really,  like eating out of trucks. 

Never in my life would I think that this would be an issue considering I was taught from a very young age to avoid “roach coaches” at all costs unless you wanted a case of raging diarrhea.  However, with the substantial rise of food trucks in Dallas I am pretty sure that it’s safe to say I’ve changed my mind. 

One of the first food trucks to hit the streets was Greenhouse Truck.  I have been hearing things about Greenhouse Truck for over a year now – mainly because of their exceptional use of social media which I have grown to appreciate as I have become a cyber-stalker of all things food.

Always one to shamelessly play favorites, I had previously breezed past Greenhouse Truck in search of a sloppy sandwich from Gandolfo’s or perhaps some kimchee fries from Ssham BBQ.  However, on a chilly day this past week I decided (after stalking the menu online, of course) that it was finally time to check out one of Dallas’ founding food truck fathers.

After announcing my plans to go during a particular lunch I was bombarded with tweets about how I better get my tight ass (ok fine, nobody actually said that) to the truck early because Greenhouse inevitably sold out every time they served.  Hmm, is that so?  Sure as shit when I strolled up there was a line wrapped around the truck.  Things were looking up, clearly there was something these people knew that I didn’t and that just can not be tolerated.

I decided on the Portobello Sandwich, mainly because it came on a ciabatta, as well as sweet potato wedges.  I was pleasantly surprised by the size of the sandwich and the fact that the bread didnt overpower the amount of filling.  A mixture of sliced portobello mushrooms, bell peppers, onions and pesto grace a delicious ciabatta baguette.  Not only am I going to hunt down the maker of this pesto to ensure that there is a jar always in my refrigerator but I also want to know where the bread comes from.  Right now my only explanation is that it fell from heaven’s gates and with the amount of f-bombs that come out of my mouth I’m not sure a trip up there is in my future.

The sandwich was so good that I’m 99.9% positive that I blacked out in a sea of “yums” at my desk back at work.  I’m sure the receptionist loved that one.  The only thing I would edit in this sandwich is the sliced portobellos.  They are brilliantly cooked but the small pieces fall out of your sandwich which only makes for a mess and a pissed off greedy eater.

Unfortunately, my glowing review of the sandwich does not include the sweet potato wedges.  Although they were the perfect combination of spicy and sweet they were exceptionally limp, without any glimmer of crisp.  I would have almost prefered that they be whipped into a mash because then they would be fantastic but seeing as this isn’t prison (or is it?) the whole sandwich / mashed potato duo doesn’t fly with me.

I was so impressed with my portobello sandwich that I decided to venture over to the Greenhouse Truck the next day for lunch as well.  Even though all I wanted to do was inhale another sandwich I decided on the Lemon Chicken Rice Bowl.  At first glance, this menu item sounds entirely too healthy for me but as I’ve said before, I’m an equal opportunity eater so I had to go for it.

Regardless of the fact that the to-go container melted my flesh off was extremely hot, I made it back to my office relatively unharmed and was ready to have deja vu from the afternoon before; filling my cube with moans all over again.  The rice bowl was surprisingly spicy which I didn’t mind because a) I’m not a fucking pussy and b) it made the brown rice have flavor - I can’t argue with that.  Brocoli, carrots, mushrooms and edaname were all mixed in with the rice all of which, yet again, was perfectly cooked.  The mixture was topped with herbed chicken that didn’t particularly have a lemony taste but was delicious nonetheless.  My only complaint about this lunch was the uncomfortable amount of chopped parsley that topped it all off.  Sure, parsley is a much better garnish than that green shit some call cilantro but it was distracting in this dish. 

The penalties that Greenhouse Truck made are more than justifiable given the fact that at the end of the day the food is outstanding.  Unfortunately for my other food truck friends, I’ve found a new place to call my favorite.  I highly suggest you run, not walk to Greenhouse Truck to check them out for yourself – especially the portobello sandwich which I will most likely have to check myself into rehab for.

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