This place is fucking
awesome horrible. I’ve been several times and it never gets better. I will NOT fall into your sick trap of beautiful decor anymore, thieves!
After an evening that may or may not have involved catching unidentified diseases at The Double Wide, my posse and I were hungry. Clearly, we wanted SUSHI after drinking…huh? Mistake #1. Mistake #2 is that we decided to venture to the worst sushi place in the Uptown-ish bubble, NAAN. Now, I have several issues with this hell hole but the list would be as long as the fucking Webster dictionary so let’s just stick to the worst details shall we?
Seeing as it was almost 10pm, I was shocked at how crowded it was inside when we arrived. We were seated promptly by your standard dipshit hostess in the back room. This aspect made me excited since I knew my party and I would be extremely inappropriate and generally it’s best if we are at the farthest point from the rest of civilization.
Besides the fact that my ass had barely touched the chair, our waiter decided to come over and ask if we were ready to order. I’m sorry sir, I was too busy trying not to vomit my Yoohoo Yahoo from Double Wide up in the 18 seconds I have been at this table to decide what raw flesh I wanted to inhale. Go AWAY. We ordered an appetizer just to get this pesky fella to stop awkwardly hoovering and grabbed the menus.
At first I thought I was having a 4th grade flashback and looking at an “I SPY” book but when I came to I realized that we had been given
blank already used sushi order forms. How rude of you to assume I wanted a spider roll. Are you trying to tell me that this is all that is available and to eat it or starve? Did you recently join the Dallas chapter of the reduce, reuse, recycle club? What. The. Fuck. Your shitty rolls are $23 on average and the fish tastes like it came from Petco so pump your brakes.
I figured I would be able to have a little chat with our waiter and get this issue sorted out but he never came back! Didn’t we order an appetizer? At this point the restaurant is empty except for the middle-aged man who keeps starring at our table. What are you looking at!? I’m HONGRY and will cut you! Oh wait, I don’t have a knife, I’m in a sushi restaurant…
After 30 minutes of no waiter, no food, no sign of life besides creepy-mc-creeper-ton in the corner, we decide to leave. Now, my mother taught me manners (shocking, I know) and never in my life have I got up and left at a restaurant like this. The worst part for me was actually realizing that peeping tom said something to me while walking past on my way out. “You’re not getting service either? You are the second table to get up and walk out..” Oh, so that’s why he kept looking at us. Mah bad.
To add fuel to my fire, our WAITER said “Have a great night!” while we were making our escape. Huh?
I have been to NAAN several times and it’s the same story. Interesting concept, ignoring your customers. Let me know how that works out for you. It is a beautiful restaurant..too bad they will be closed by Winter.